HUMILITY/HUMILIATION

One of our deepest fears is to be humiliated--to be treated as if we have no value. We all have vivid memories of being:

--unheard
--unloved
--unwelcome
--discounted
--uncared for
--shamed
--denied
--judged
--unworthy
--disrespected

As along as our self worth is dependent on how others treat us, we will always be open to humiliation

When we examine each instance of past humiliation, really let ourselves feel it, and then forgive the humiliator and ourselves, we will take a huge step toward wholeness and true humility. Why? Because the act of forgiveness allows us to see the humiliator (and ourselves) with compassion, to recognize our mutual pain of being humiliated. As we forgive, we heal, clearing our path further to our Source, the Divine.

There will come a time when we cannot be humiliated ever again because our self worth comes from within--our Source. I heard a person quietly say once in response to a particularly insensitive comment, "You can't offend me." I saw humility in action. This comment was made in compassion--the healed person who said it recognized the broken, unhealed heart of the speaker.

When we are whole, we can heal others just by being completely present. Carolyn Myss, in ENTERING THE CASTLE, says, "Humility is wearing our souls on the outside."

Please share your experiences on your path to true humility--we all need each others' support.

EVERYDAY COURAGE

I am preparing for a family birthday celebration for my husband, Kel--he's going to be 62. I know my proclivity for getting buried in the details of preparation--cleaning the house, grocery shopping, wrapping presents, cooking, etc.--and ending up frazzled and exhausted at the end of the day. Sound familiar? I also have the added joy of doing all this with three of my grandsons staying the weekend.

I love my husband, I love my grandsons, I love to have my family over, and I love to cook. My challenge is to reach the end of the day with my heart full, a smile on my face, and just pleasantly tired. As long as I stay aware of my source and rein in my ego, this will happen. Why is this courage?

Because it takes courage to choose to be happy. I've watched my mother choose to be happy after she moved to a retirement home. I heard her say, "Gee, I don't have to do my laundry, I don't have to cook my meals, I don't have to clean up after myself, and everyone here is wonderful to me. What a life!" I have seen people in this same retirement home make different choices about their response to their life situation, causing sadness and pain to their families and their care takers.

It takes courage to accept what is, to be here now. It takes courage to see each person as a vital and blessed part of my life, to be able at any moment to sacrifice what I am to what I can become.

Heroes rarely see themselves as having acted in any courageous way. Many times, we've heard them say, "I just did what anyone would do." Sounds kind of humble, doesn't it? For just a split second there, they were called upon to be exactly in the moment--their egos did not have time to kick into gear and they did just the perfect thing.

It can be like that all the time when we understand how our egos have kept us from living consciously in this present moment. Courage, then, has a chance to rise and respond, seeing the current situation without the filters of fear and self-protection, and to do what's needed at just the right time. Eckhart Tolle wrote THE NEW EARTH, which helped me to finally understand that the ego cannot exist in the "now," it is always about my history--the traumas of my past. Tolle went so far as to suggest that we don't even need our egos anymore. That's a courageous statement and one that bears investigating.

So living in the light of this perfect moment allows the qualities of my spirit to flow--compassion, grace, healing, love, peace, etc.

Please share your stories of everyday courage so we can all support each other in our journeys.